Strategic Marriage Counseling, Individual Counseling, & Couples Counseling for Raleigh, Cary, Apex, Morrisville, Holly Springs & Fuquay NC at Cary Counseling Center (919 467 1180)
Dr. Bryce Kaye, Psychologist, psychotherapist & marriage counselor for the Raleigh Cary area
Author of The Marriage First Aid Kit, a book about marriage therapy and relationship improvement
As seen on WRAL-TV:
Strategic Counseling is Active and Direct
"Strategic counseling" is active and direct unlike other forms of counseling that are passive. Whether it's individual psychotherapy or couples counseling, I work with a logical plan on how to help you to achieve your goals. I believe that you deserve more out of counseling than just being heard and supported. My active style is to teach you different strategies to gradually change your emotions and emotionally driven behaviors over time. That way, you can grow to become the person or the couple that you want to be.
So that you can better understand my approach, I have placed an incredible amount of useful information on this website. If you want individual counseling or therapy, read about the different types that I offer. If you seek help for your marriage, then I suggest you read about the different syndromes and also the book chapters that I've placed on this page. - even if you don't come for counseling. I believe it's good to help yourselves first by getting a better understanding of what's really going on. - Bryce Kaye
Some Types of Counseling and Psychotherapy That Dr. Kaye Offers to Raleigh and Cary Residents:
Marriage counseling and relationship therapy (Click Here)
Healing emotional wounds (trauma resolution) (Click Here)
Raising self-esteem and reducing self-defeating shame (Click Here)
Anger management & assertiveness training (Click Here)
Adjustment counseling & stress management (Click Here)
Read about our limited time offer of
FREE INTENSIVE MARRIAGE COUNSELING
on
a 7 day sailing odyssey. Dr. Kaye will charge you absolutely nothing for
these counseling and boating services if you qualify. In addition to being
an accomplished marriage expert,
Captain Kaye is a U.S. Coast Guard licensed merchant marine officer with a
masters level certification.
Click Here To Read More About This Offer.
Check to see if you have any of these common marital syndromes:
Role-Bound, Emotional Starvation Syndrome:
Both parties have evolved to interact with each other like business managers, going about the business of managing everyday life but without mutual play or sentimental affirmation of each other. Special time is not allocated for intimate talking. No significant effort is made to share intimate time away from parenting roles. Each party feels "taken for granted." Arguments flare up about small control issues or events that are interpreted as indicating a lack of appreciation of each other.
Pursuer - Evader Syndrome
: One party is more comfortable with the expression of intense feelings. The other party dreads intensity, especially heated conflict. The person who dreads intensity finds ways to emotionally withdraw by finding responsibilities to take up their time. The other person sees their partner withdrawing and reacts by aggressively pursuing contact. They often intrude by expressing their resentments in a derogatory manner. The pursuer/intruder may also openly interpret the withdrawing party’s feelings and motives. The withdrawing party reacts by withdrawing further. The pursuer feels like they are being driven "crazy."
Initiator - Dependent Syndrome
: One party (the initiator) has somehow wound up with all the responsibility for planning the fun part of the relationship. The dependent party may be very responsible in their job role. However, when it comes to family or relationship activity, they look to the initiator for ideas. The dependent party is "easy" and ready to agree. The initiator feels as if they have another child for a partner. They miss the excitement of another perspective besides their own and they feel lonely although they may cover it over with anger.
Delinquent Helper Syndrome
: One party (the "task-master") has somehow wound up with all of the responsibility for overseeing the household chores. The other party often doesn’t "help". The task-master frequently reminds the delinquent helper what needs to be done. The delinquent helper often forgets if they’re not frequently reminded.
"Sneaky" Spending Behavior:
One party is trying to reduce spending to live within a realistic budget, the other party is often unmindful of what they spend. The less mindful person may not be forthcoming about what they buy.Conflicting Levels of Sexual Interest: One party wants it more, the other party wants it less. This does not refer to syndromes in which there is emotional conflict or emotional alienation affecting sexual interest. Rather, this is merely referring to different levels of sexual drive.
Non-violent Raging Behavior
: In a conflict situation, one part is more likely to yell and scream before retreating in a "huff." In some couples, the rager may disapprove of their own behavior but feel helpless to prevent it. They may try to avoid conflict situations altogether.
Dr. Kaye, author of The Marriage First Aid Kit, discusses some important truths about relationships (Parts 1 and 2)
Here are chapters from Dr. Kaye's book if you want to have a deeper understanding about what causes communication to break down in a relationship.
Just a few words about how and why I wrote this book.
This chapter illustrates how our own fear of shame is the greatest obstacle we have to face if we want to improve an intimate relationship.
Chapter 2 - The Structure of Vital Relationships
Love based relationships do not have as much stability or resilience as do integrity based relationships. This chapter describes the strong foundation of a relationship that can stand the test of time.
Chapter 3 - Balance and Paradox
A vital relationship needs to be dynamic and not static. Opposing needs and emotional states must be kept balanced over time. This chapter unravels the paradox.
Chapter 4 - Nurturing Healthy Attachments
Relationships must be fed. It’s not enough just to feel. This chapter explains the fundamentals about how attachment needs can be effectively met.
Chapter 5 - Love's Hidden Assassin
A very common relationship killer operates far below our awareness. It leads to the numbing loss of attraction and affection.
Chapter 6 - The Other Usual Suspects
This chapter outlines the other most common relationship killers.
Chapter 7 - Freeing and Strengthening Your Hedonic Self
If you’re starting to numb out and lose attraction, this chapter suggests what you do to start resuscitating the part of yourself that’s going dormant.
Chapter 8 - Defending Autonomy
This chapter gives you tools to ward off covert inhibition that might otherwise strangle your affection.
This chapter describes different types of constructive and destructive conflict. Strategies are outlined for managing each.
Chapter 10 - Sharing Power and Authority
This chapter provides some useful tools for negotiating chores, structuring finances, and dealing with in-laws.
This chapter describes psychological elements of great sex as well as some guidelines on how to get there.
Chapter 12 - Mapping Your Strategy
This chapter discusses how to plan for change.
Addendum: Message to a Daughter
Here are some open forum discussions Dr. Kaye has had with people who asked questions on his internet Marriage First Aid Kit. Choose your topic of interest below:
The following are some of
Dr. Kaye's other writings that you
might find interesting:
to enter the main site for Cary Counseling Center.
If you’re interested and you're willing to travel from Raleigh to Cary:
If you want to explore the possibility of individual or marriage counseling with me, I usually recommend one session and then you can go back home to think about it. One session is usually enough time for me to give you feedback about a recommended strategy for individual or marriage counseling. To schedule a meeting time, call me at 919-467-1180. My office is convenient to most parts of Raleigh, Cary, Apex and Morrisville.
Affiliated web pages
Our private couples counseling cruise at LoveOdyssey.net
Our private marriage help cruise at LoveOdyssey.net
The strategy behind our intensive marriage counseling
cruise
www.carycounseling.net/counselingcaryapexraleigh.html
www.carycounseling.net/marriagecounselingraleighcaryapex.html
www.carycounseling.net/psychotherapycaryraleighapex.html
www.counseling.net/MarriageCounselingforHollySprings2.html
www.carycounseling.net/staff/brycekaye/bryceapproach.html
www.loveodyssey.net/schedule/strategy.php
www.loveodyssey.net/schedule/strategy_7day.php
www.loveodyssey.net/schedule/strategy_5day.php
www.loveodyssey.net/contact/CounselingRetreat.php
www.loveodyssey.net/contact/CounselingRetreats.php
www.loveodyssey.net/contact/RetreatForCouples.php
www.loveodyssey.net/contact/CouplesRetreats.php