How I Approach Therapy
By Jeanne Bolick
It takes a lot of courage to pick up the phone and call for a therapy appointment. I respect that fact and believe that trust is the most important part of the therapeutic relationship. Perhaps by reading a little about my approach, you will gain information helpful in deciding whether I am the right therapist for you.
When working with children, I always include the child’s parents, and often their siblings, in the therapeutic process. Family therapy is a systems approach in which the basic assumption is that a change (for better or worse) in one person will result in changes in the rest of the system. Therefore, it is important to recognize the whole family system, not just the part.
When
working with adults, either individually or as a couple, I consider the
person’s current family and family of origin.
We all bring with us certain patterns and preconceptions.
Often we repeat patterns established years ago, even when those patterns
might seem destructive now. Bringing
those patterns into consciousness is one of the first steps in effecting change.
Therapy
is a process. It is most effective
when the therapist and client work together to establish goals for the therapy,
and then develop definable objectives for achieving the goals.
When working with an entire family, sometimes that involves the creation
of a “family contract”, goals and objectives everyone can agree with and
sign. If each family member has the
opportunity to participate in the creation of a family contract or plan,
powerful work has already been achieved.
I
have worked with children and adults who have undergone different kinds of
trauma, including child abuse, a death in the family, domestic violence, or
other kinds of loss. Sometimes what
we call “talk therapy”, the sitting down and talking about the situation, is
not enough. Sometimes it is helpful
to use non-verbal techniques, such as art, sand tray, or play therapy.
Young children often do not have the words or the maturity to sit and
converse about difficulties in their lives.
By acting out the situations through non-verbal techniques, we can
effectively work through the problems. Adults
who have been traumatized often find that they think about the trauma over and
over again. The use of non-verbal therapeutic techniques can help the
adult become “unstuck” through the development of powerful metaphors and by
looking at the situation in a new way.
If
you do decide to schedule an appointment with me, please feel free to ask me
questions about the process. It is
essential that you feel comfortable with your therapist.